This is a post most readers should skip. TMI. However, I have preggo friends, plus I want to digest it for my memories/Kivani to read later. So here goes.
So Riles was pretty much the ultimate natural home birth (even if I wasn't planning on it). I was clueless that I was so far along, we had a quick labour and most of it we were on a walk with Tenge. Our midwife came as Riles's head came out, and I officially had a baby without ever being 'checked'.
With Kivs it was a bit different. I had planned a home birth this time got obstetric cholestasis so became high risk. The docs explained that this meant induction, constant fetal monitoring and hospital birth with both OB/GYN and pediatrician present. The midwives consult with the OB and still coordinate my care and results, but when, where and how of birth becomes his decision (note: his, not mine...). The last few weeks of pregnancy were very different, and I did not enjoy them. Partially since I couldn't sleep due to itching, partially as I was still working and going to class and trying to squeze in four doc appointments/week, partially as I was so concerned for baby's health (risk of stillbirth increases as pregnancy continues; in the states they deliver at 36 weeks). I wanted her out.
I was to be induced on Fri 17th, at 37wk6d. On the wed my mwife did a sweep, I was 2cm but no effacement or softening. Poo. Friday we went to Burnaby hospital to be induced, I was somewhat hoping for some progress (heck I was hoping my body would decide to labour on its own), but nada. So Cervadil it was, for cervical ripening. The idea is to get the cervix open, otherwise the contractions (typicaly started through oxytosin in an induction) are pushing against a closed door. Then its just a waiting game. I wasn't allowed to leave the hospital.
I'm not good at waiting.
Once you go down the intervention path, its frustrating having no feedback. I wanted to know how far along I was. Its also frustrating just waiting in hospital. Fortunately the nurse said that until I was having contractions I could walk around the hospital minus a check in every hour and monitoring every three hours. Si was a sport and we walked laps for hours, figured we may as well get some exercise in our kid-free time. We did stairwell squats, lunges, all sorts (notice the 'we'; as I said he was a sport). If we could have willed this baby out, she would have come.
I don't know why I was so determined to have her then. Part of it is that I wanted their birthdays to be easy to remember (I know, seriously). Mostly 'cause I didn't like being in the hospital. I'm generally healthy and didn't have a strong opinion/any experience before. I found it irritating to have a different nurse, actually often 2 or 3 different ones, randomly ask the same questions at each check in, say they'll come back for the NST, then an hour later a different nurse would come in with the scope and we'll start all over. If they come in to give an NST, why not just bring the machine? I wasn't in a rush, heck I couldn't even leave. But the inefficiency of it drove the engineer in me crazy. Plus the maternity ward (where you wait until you are in labour, and where you go post-baby) was full and I was in a room with three beds and 15 loud visitors.
At 4pm I was checked at 3-4cm and still long. I was to be induced again the next morning, either wi Cervadil again (if my cervix still wasn't ripe) or oxytocin if it was ready. Frustrating. But it felt different/pressure so I felt like she'd decended. I was also having mild contractions, nothing crazy or regular, but more than your standard braxton hicks. As with Riles, she was sunny side up and they were all in my back. Yuk. But it felt like we were getting somewhere. Then around 6pm they stopped all together. Nothing.
At some stage we clued in that this was our last kid-free night in a while, had a date coffee + donut in the cafeteria and watched most of a movie on the computer. We slept, I woke at 2am with more early labour contractions, and we did another hour or so of walking hoping it would start 'real' labour. No luck. Back to sleep, I was being woken now by the stupid back pains, but not regular and 20-30seconds, so fine.
Side note: with Riles we were so late calling as all my pre-labour contractions were <1 minute. It seemed the same with Kivani, and when Si was checking them based on my reaction, they were still 20-30s. However, on the NST machine they showed up as 1-1.5 minutes ... so I did have real labour both times, but wasn't counting the build-up and wind-down of each contraction in the timing.
Then suddenly at 7am, on came labour. It came quickly and was quite intense. Si went to the nurse station and asked them to call our midwife and get me up to labour and delivery. The nurse told us to wait until I'd eaten breakfast sometime around 8:30 and then she'd check in on me. He told her I was a fast labourer and they needed to get me upstairs, ASAP. She said she'd call a porter. Twenty minutes later he went out and found she hadn't called either midwife or porter yet
We arrive in L&D at 7:35am. By the way, if planning a baby, don't have one at shift change. Noone wanted to take us. I saw two nurses I had seen from my NST days and said that I didn't care that it was shift change, they had to look after me. Between contractions I was totally bossing them - call the pediatrician, OB, hook up my IV (I had group B strep so was supposed to have antibiotics), hook up NST etc... as with Riley I didn't seem to enter the Lala-land but was clear thinking the whole way through. The new nurse (brand new on the job) came in, and I was pushing. Unfortunately at this time no doctor or midwife was there to actually deliver the baby. So they asked me to wait. Breathe through the need to push until someone arrives who can deliver (my comment to this is censored out). I know that I can have this baby, and that Si can catch, but remember we're still super concerned about baby's health, and merconium is very common with cholestatis babies, so I wait (cursing the nurses downstairs for not calling earlier, this did not need to be a panic situation). Not pushing was the hardest part of the labour. This was almost ten minutes and felt much longer.
And then the most welcome news that Beth, my midwife is running down the hall, so now I can push. I know why second babies are easier. You know how uncomfortable it's going to get and know the faster it's over the better. I got on all fours and let 'er rip. It was three or four pushes until my water broke (hallelujiah it was clear!), then two pushes and the head was showing but not crowning. And then a huge push (I think I actually roared, and thought how proud Riley would be at his moms lion sounds), and blimey if the whole body didn't come flying out. Si was there with Beth, and caught her himself (flyhalf hands come through again!). Immediately Kivani hollered, and I have never felt such relief. She was born at 7:55am.
I had spent the last month petrified of losing our baby due to the cholestatis, and suddenly (very suddenly!) we had a beautiful healthy baby girl. The relief was so strong. Beth took over, got her on my chest, calmed down the intensity of the last 20 minutes, and we just hung out with Kivani until the placenta etc came out. She was so gorgeous - all smashed up, covered in vernix and all - and immediately snuggled in. I needed a stitch for a small 1st degree tear, and we were ready to go back to maternity.
There is where I most wanted to be home. All the beds were full. Our room was full of visitors for the other two girls, one of whom was indian and had all her extended family in the room at once. We'd just had a baby after being up a lot last night, and they were making a ton of noise. They wanted us to stay for at least one day for monitoring, so we sucked it up, and dealt with the traffic. But from experience of being home wi Riles... I craved the quiet (or at least the familiar chaos) of our home. And having my own bathroom. And being able to carry your baby (not allowed to carry outside of your cube in the hospital, must instead push in a cot). Kivs did great in all her checks and first thing the next morning we were discharged.
Thrilled to have our lovely healthy fat baby home.
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Some thoughts on midwife vs. doctor: My take only. Three years ago I wouldn't have considered a non-doctor birth, because of safety concerns. I've changed.
Notice that all this time, the OB and pediatrician that they made such a big deal of prior to the birth, ... nowhere. The fetal monitoring I was so worried about during labour ... only started really during transition since that is when I got to the ward. Even with us both pushing to go upstairs, saying that I'm a fast labourer, we had to fight to get moved and found it took them more than 20 minutes to call the midwife. The 'safety' of being in the hospital was overwritten by the fact that there was no continuity of care; even on the same shift, we would see 3-4 nurses, none of whom knew me. The hospital was so worried about not wasting space in the L&D ward that I seriously would have delivered in a hallway without anyone qualified had the nice nurse who took us up not clued in. The safest part of our whole birth was the fact that our midwife knew me, drove like a maniac to get there and ran from the parking lot. My only regret is that we didn't call her ourselves as soon as we went into labour. It ended up okay so I skip over it, but had something gone wrong, I'd be asking serious questions on what happened.
Huge thanks to Pomegranate Midwives for their amazing care.
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